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Thoughts of a Lifestyle Domme

I'm a lifestyle domme. These are my thoughts. /fin

Okay, but somewhat more seriously, dominance has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. Long before I really knew what it was. I pursued D/s as soon as I could and now have a 24/7 TPE dynamic . Over the years, I've written articles, guides, created resources and other bits and put them in one place. And you've found it.

Have a browse, have a read and do have fun.

Effective Punishments for Subs: A Comprehensive Guide for BDSM Dynamics

March 16, 2025

A comprehensive guide to effective punishments for subs: from exploring the role of submissive punishment to a step-by-step on how to set effective protocol, this guide covers all the bases.

Maintenance Spanking: Why & How To Add It To Your Relationship

November 14, 2023

A quick guide, covering the FAQs around maintenance spanking in D/s dynamics, including protocols, intensity levels, how to distinguish maintenance and punishment discipline and practical troubleshooting.

flat lay photography of eight coffee latte in mugs on round table

Why Male Chastity Is Not A Femdom Essential

September 27, 2023

Chastity is often framed as a must-have in femdom dynamics. Have a read and delve into why male chastity really isn't a femdom essential.

Punishment vs Funishment – An Important Distinction

July 24, 2023

Distinguishing punishment vs funishment is not just semantics. It's central to clear communication on a topic which is the backbone of power exchange dynamics.

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Snapshot of My Dynamic: Sunday Afternoon Reading

May 19, 2022

I often get asked what a 24/7 TPE dynamic looks like. While there are, of course, times I subject my sub to various brilliantly sadistic torments, the majority of time we spend in space does not look like that that at all. For one thing, inflicting pain on someone is tiring.…

Why ‘Force Me To Submit’ Can Be A Red Flag

September 19, 2021

‘I need someone to force me to submit’ is yet another sentiment which shows up in my inbox surprisingly often. It has rubbed me the wrong way for as long as I can remember, but I couldn’t put my finger on why. After all, the rhetoric of force weaves itself…

Appearance Is Not The Foundation of Female Dominance

November 13, 2021

‘You want me, but you can’t have me. You’re not worthy,’ whispers the latex-clad dominatrix stereotype with her over-lined red lips. Her power stems in the fact she is an object of visual attraction. She is perfectly unattainable and therefore all the more desirable – a goddess on a pedestal…

Maintenance Spanking: Why & How To Add It To Your Relationship

November 14, 2023

A large number of red flags against the sky as a background - a red flag parade, if you like

Jonah Hill, Boundaries, and ‘Being Controlling’ in a D/s Context

July 10, 2023

A quick topical write up of a conversation I had with a friend about Jonah Hill, boundaries and what it means to be controlling.

Black and white of textured background representing row of vertical beams with shadow in contemporary house

Fifty Shades: My Addition to the Eternal Controversy

December 13, 2018

Hectolitres of electronic ink have been poured out by various bloggers in the BDSM community on the subject of the ‘Fifty Shades‘ trilogy and, in many respects, the matter has been written into its grave. I think pretty much everyone has read the resounding criticisms of Christian Grey as a…

E-Lust Digest

Thoughts of a Lifestyle Domme

Effective Punishments for Subs: A Comprehensive Guide for BDSM Dynamics

Maintenance Spanking: Why & How To Add It To Your Relationship

Why Male Chastity Is Not A Femdom Essential

Punishment vs Funishment – An Important Distinction

Snapshot of My Dynamic: Sunday Afternoon Reading

Why ‘Force Me To Submit’ Can Be A Red Flag

Appearance Is Not The Foundation of Female Dominance

Maintenance Spanking: Why & How To Add It To Your Relationship

Jonah Hill, Boundaries, and ‘Being Controlling’ in a D/s Context

Fifty Shades: My Addition to the Eternal Controversy

E-Lust 167 – Maintenance Spanking, (Mis)reading Dracula and Fucking Machines

E-Lust 166 – Chastity, Multi-Orgasmic Men and AI

E-Lust 164 – Punishment, Personality and Penises

E-Lust 163 – Sadism, Sex Rooms and Steamy Skills for Dirty Talk

Welcome to E-Lust 162 – Protocol, Phone Sex & P-Spot Probe

Snapshot of My Dynamic: Sunday Afternoon Reading

RIP ‘Gentle Femdom’, An Outdated Term

Appearance Is Not The Foundation of Female Dominance

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