Thoughts of a Lifestyle Domme

Just A Little Expectation

Everyone has unrealistic expectations of any dynamic (and any relationship for that matter), when it only exists in fantasy. The moment it begins in practice, we are inevitably disappointed, because reality can never precisely match imagination.

Now, I am not talking about soul crushing, complete and utter disappointment, the sort where your expectations and hopes are completely torn down and brutally stomped on. (Although, naturally, that does happen, but it’s not quite the point I’m making here). Just the sort which insidiously creeps into a moment which otherwise would be oh-so-perfect, just because in your head, a little something was different. Sometimes, it isn’t even as if you had a concrete scenario, planned to the last detail – just a general impression that something ought to be just a little more, a little less, a little… Other.

It is something you have to be prepared for when you come to translate fantasy into reality – the two will never align perfectly. But what quite a lot of people fail to appreciate, I think, is that this isn’t a bad thing. Reality has a habit of surprising you, in ways you never could have imagined and, quite frankly, life and kink would be exceedingly dull if things happened exactly as we imagined and planned. Even for us Dominants.

Miss Rosa

Miss Rosa

I'm a lifestyle domme - D/s is my ‘normal’. It's an integral part of who and how I am. This blog contains BDSM advice, memories, rants, rambles, and answers to the questions which rock up in my inbox over and over. If you have any thoughts, do leave a comment!

10 thoughts on “Just A Little Expectation”

  1. An interesting observation about how an ideal relationship is often flawed in reality… but do you end it when you realize that…or how do you handle it?

    1. Every aspect of kink in reality is at least a little different to the fantasy of it, but that does not necessarily make it flawed. And every relationship has its challenges. That’s not a reason to end it.

          1. My post places the blame on the limited exposure newbie guys have to BDSM because of social taboo. It’s helpful that dominants show their human side to them both privately and publicly in blog postings such as yours.

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I’m a lifestyle domme. This is a place for my writing and reflections on kink, lifestyle D/s, and the endless stream of nonsense in my inbox. 

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